There comes a time, to us all, when we finally have to accept that things are over and we have to let go in order to move on. Whether this be the death of someone, the end of a relationship or something else, there are always those feelings of sadness and a sense of grieving.
In 2005 I ended a 12 year relationship. It's taken me nearly 5 years and 2 further relationships to get over it properly. 5 years!
It was the break-up of one of those 'further relationships' in 2007 that prompted me to write 'The Long Goodbye'. Having done nothing musically for 10 years, I bought a cheap acoustic guitar from a charity shop and learned some chords. I'd always been a bass guitarist up til then. Tunes started to come out of the guitar, first, 'Where Do We Go From Here' as I sat in the bedroom, ruminating on the doubts surfacing in my relationship and then, on a lovely sunny afternoon at my folks' garden, 'Maybe Tonight'. More followed and I decided I'd better record them. I purchased a 16 track digital recorder and through August and September 2007 me and Ju (my bro) spent many a long hour, meticulously recording and re-recording take after take of guitar parts, keyboard parts, vocals, harmonies as well as programming drum patterns, working out how to add effects and how to mix all the tracks into a listenable left and right stereo track.
The mixing took even longer than the recordings themselves. I did the whole lot on headphones which, I soon found, didn't sound anywhere near as good when I played them back on my hi-fi. So, further mixes were done, adjusting EQ and the like until I was happy with the sound on a variety of sources. When I played it to people they all liked it. One friend said it was the album of the year!
In 2008 The Long Goodbye was available as a digital download. But then I broke up with someone else (yes, another one!) and as the guy who ran my website at the time knew the girl we kinda lost touch and eventually it was taken down. Me and Ju started doing a few 'open mics' in Bury St. Eds but it wasn't until a chance meeting with Brett Alexander Robertson in Caffe Nero in October that things started to move forward with apace. Brett too had had 10 years without music. He'd had plenty of offers from bands wanting him to play drums for them but nothing gripped him enough to want to get back into the music scene. As chance would have it, I had a copy of 'The Long Goodbye' in my 'man-bag'. Brett loved it as soon as he heard it, remastered it, designed The Lullabys website and put the 'demo' tracks of the album on-line as streaming media files.
This summer I re-mixed many of the tracks and after a final re-mastering - and adding a new, previously unreleased track - you can download your copy from iTunes now! If you want to get your hands on an actual CD we will have the first ones off the press at our gig at the Arc in Bury on Thursday 19th November. It's late night shopping in the town so treat yourself or your partner to the CD. 11 lullabys for grown-ups about love, loss and hope, written during times of great uncertainty, upheaval and insecurity. Stuff we've all had to go through. That's the hard sell over. Not my style. If you like the songs you'll want to buy it or get a copy for a friend in need of some soothing.
Truth be told, it's been quite a dilemma, putting the album out there again. Alot has changed since the recording of it. On the album (as on the 'Maybe Tonight' EP) you will hear electric guitars, drums, keyboards, strings, the lot; a full band sound. Now, when we play live we strip it right back to basics. Listen to Nivana's studio albums and compare it to their 'unplugged'. Great songs with distorted or acoustic guitars. So, the dilemma I had as an artist and songwriter was 'can I put this album out even though we now sound different?'
The fact of the matter is that the songs need to be out there! They have to be given life, some airplay, before I can finally lay them to rest. Indeed, if the album remained un-released, sitting on my shelf gathering dust or like a skeleton in the closet, haunting me forever, it would seem as though all the creative efforts of the last 2 years had gone to waste. A potential lost masterpiece? Surely not just a personal catharsis, but something to be shared with others?
So, as we approach the end of 2009 and with the release of the newly remixed 'The Long Goodbye' it seems time to let go. Time to move on. You can listen to the tunes, play them, sing along, tap your fingers, let the melodies bounce around in your head and wake you in the morning like an internal alarm clock or a bad dream because I have to share them, let them go...release them from the grip they have had over me since 2007. Sure, The Lullabys will still play these songs live, in our raw, stripped back fashion - and new venues and fresh ears need to hear them! - but there is a new horizon ahead of us. Already 5 new songs have been written for a follow-up album. You might have heard some of these at our gigs. The other tracks are being worked on right now. But that's 2010 and beyond. We must live for now...live for today...and this very moment.
Enjoy 'The Long Goodbye'. 2010 promises to be very exciting. That's optimism for you. And that is a feeling that only comes when you are finally turning the corner and letting go of the past. Things can be good again. They can be bloody great! If only we dare to dream...
Til next time live, love, learn and laugh at yourself!
Lullaby Gav
Download 'The Long Goodbye' from iTunes via our website http://www.thelullabys.com/
Thursday, 22 October 2009
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